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Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Men Dont Cry !! Alas !!

Men dont cry ,okay I dont believe that !!!I believe that big boys don't cry public ally ! Yes ,Men cry but often when its raining and when they are in shower lol !!!But On a serious note I guess the only reason men feel it is a weakness to cry is because society has taught them that it is.
Just like it has taught women to be emotional and nurturing. Men can not cry in public , they just cant , its the society which has made them so closed in this matter. Men face a stigma if they cry just like women face a stigma if they are not motherly and nurturing and emotional. It isn’t that way in every society though. It’s all about gender roles and what we have been taught are the right and wrong ways for men and women to behave .I don’t cry often, call it a mix between society’s expectations and my own foolish pride.

I am very emotional, and I’ve trained to keep them in check.I see it as a weakness because it makes me look like I’m whining.It’s not allways a weakness, but for me as a man it makes it look like I can’t handle it anymore. And yes, I cry alone some rare times.This type of non-crying reminds me of going to accident and emergency and being asked how much pain I was in no pain , hell yeah I am iron man !!And when the Nurse put dettol or what ever it was on the wounds I went "Fuc*********"..This is so not it!!! The answer is not psychological. It is more to do with the society. So from that day i realized that it had nothing to do with anything but the society , In the male dominated societies of the past and to some extent in the present, men were supposed to be strong. Any sign of so called "weakness" was labelled as womanly. So, not crying, not vacillating, able to keep secrets were labelled as manly and their opposite as womanly.
Both women and men are emotional and have control over their emotions at their own levels and depend on the way they take life as. When a woman smokes, she is found disgusting by people and same is when a man cries. Sometimes people have to live for the society's sake for their survival with respect and dignity.
In all countries and especially like in India, that are still quite a way from fully breaking the male dominance; the society still tends to raise its boys and girls that way .

As a result, men are particularly uncomfortable during heated “relationship” conversations. Faced with a partner’s negative feelings, a man often becomes mute—fleeing into stormy silence.I tell you this silence has killed many relationships , This silence is the worst thing that had happened with the male Gender .It had made him stay away from reality to an extent.Come on Just think when you are in a heated argument with your boyfriend have you ever seen him being emotional and if by chance he gets emotional , The girl thinks his guy is too weak .Oh Yes many of you dont think like that but somewhere in back of your mind your think like that , you do !! Trust me !!

PS: This is part of the challenge by Pooja Pradeep of Indiblogger !
PS 2 : Feedback on this is quite very important , as its just the second challenge I have accepted.


  1. done justice to the challenge. excellent penning.

    1. @Maun Vision
      Wow Thanks for the compliment !!!
      Thanks for visiting by!

  2. So true Rahul... I loved the blog..!! :D It is my favourite topic of discussion. It's so true silence kills us and you don't want to talk when there is a great argument and the relationship is in stack! You sit staring at the floor like it might fall any moment..!! It's nerve wracking I tell you.. :/ I won't say my guy is weak if he cries come on! He's a human with emotions.. infact I have forced him to cry if he wants to.. crying is just another emotion and girls dont own it! It's because of the society! Very true.. Nice blog.. :)

    1. @gayathri
      thanks for ur words
      I am just saying the society has made us not to cry publically !!!!

  3. Totally agree with you Rahul...
    Men are strictly not allowed to show their emotions. And the same applies to boys too (sometimes, believe me). I happen to personally experience such immense rage and sadness that I just wanted to burst but with people around, I don't want them to say that I am shy AND vulnerable...
    Your best post....Amazing

    1. @Nitin Verma
      Thats a huge huge compliment !!! Thanks to pooja for nmaking me write this.
      But yes our society has made us like that only.
      and yes guys cant burst out their emotions with tears !

  4. True words Rahul :). Gotto agree with all your points.
    Yeah it is true right. I mean if I see a Guy cry in front of me, I will see him as week. I know they suffer but yeah crying seems like a weekness.
    But its not the same with kids right? :).

    You have written beautifully man :D :).
    Awesome post.
    Hats Off

    1. @princess poo
      Thanks a lot for your wonderful words.
      Thanks to you for making me write this.
      ans yes kids dont have to hide your emotions !!!
      Thanks a lot I have received wonderful feedback !!

  5. Being a girl, It felt nice to see a rarely seen other side!:)
    Amazingly written!
    Emotions stir up!
    Loved reading it:)

    1. @kinara :
      Hehe its not always easy to be on this side :)
      Anyways thanks for visiting and thanks for ur words.

  6. Very well written and true facts included. Bingo!

  7. Not only men..Even crying women is considered vulnerable, It was advice given by my husband. :-)

    1. Yes its surely considered as vulnerable.
      Thanks for visiting.

  8. 'I tell you this silence has killed many relationships' ...So true!!! Again challenge perfectly conquered :-)

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