The Emptiness!!! Yes its back!!!
That something which fills it to full? That something is missing in life these days. There is this certain emptiness inside me. I don’t know what it is.. I don’t know what it could be but it’s not homesickness for sure. I know I m going home next month on Holi and my parents are coming here this weekend. But this something is just killing me. Something is just making me feel alone. Something has changed! I don’t know what, but something has changed. May be something is added or may be subtracted from my life but yes its definite it has made its mark. But I don’t remember doing anything. There are these few days in my life when I feel like being alone not really alone but I start missing something which I don’t even know what it is.
While coming to office I feel like did I miss something, driving my bike I feel like I must have forgotten something. In office if I m working than its all right but when I m not I don’t feel like being workless. While coming back from office after the day’s work, I feel this emptiness every day. When I reach home I feel that I have done everything but one thing which I don’t know!!! I put on loud music while coming to office and also while going back, but still I can’t reclaim my full life. I still feel that I have lost something. These few days do come after 3-4 months and go away like anything. These few days will pass soon I know, but why this emptiness, why this hollowness, which gives me sleepless nights , thoughtless thoughts, workless work, I keep on thinking what’s happening and the result is always a "nothing" staring at me like a jerk. Now a days I have realized that I can’t escape it so I feel like doing something to avoid it, I keep on working, want to remain busy, if I have to wait for something feel like chatting with someone but still this emptiness does not go away. Sometimes I feel that this routine work is killing me .because it has become a boring IT life with same routine, same politics ,same old thoughtless thoughts and nothing new to do, but is it the only reason.
Have somebody else also experienced the same. Can somebody help me!!!